I am hosting author Natialie Wright today, who has written a wonderful Mother's Day post.....
Thank you, Jan, for having me as a guest today, Mother’s Day. While recently mulling over the meaning of motherhood, I wrote a short story that I’ll share with you today. Happy Mother’s Day everyone!
You open your eyes and the first thing you see is her face. You love nothing more than looking at that face. You don’t yet have the words to define what you see. Al you know is that you feel happier when she casts her eyes on yours; that when her lips curl up at the sides it makes your lips curl up too – and that feels nice.
You’ve just hit the ground after stepping off the bus and you feel rotten inside. There’s never been a worse day.
It started in the morning when you unpacked your backpack and realized you’d forgotten to pack your math homework. Then at lunch your so-called best friend didn’t save you a seat and you had to sit alone. Things went downhill after that. Josh’s usual teasing in art class made you want to punch him or cry, but you don’t do either.
She’s there, waiting for you. Some days you wish she wouldn’t hover. You’re a big kid now, not three. But that day, it feels kinda nice to know that she knows you’ve had a miserable day before you even say anything. She hugs you tight and lets you tell her all about it. By dinner she has somehow managed to make you forget it was the worst day ever in the history of days.
You’re in your room with the door closed, but she’s knocking on it. Can’t she see you don’t want to talk? Doesn’t she get that door closed means “leave me alone?” you’re not in third grade anymore. Maybe she used to be able to make it all better with a hug, but this isn’t something that gets better with a hug and a cookie. She wouldn’t understand anyway.
“Go away!” you scream. “I just want to be alone.”
She stops knocking and you hear her footsteps retreat down the hall. “Thank God!” you think as you cry out your heartache into your pillow. You don’t know that she is in her room, crying her heartache out into her pillow.
You’re not sure why you’re so mad at her one day, then curling into her lap to watch T.V. with her the next. It’s like sometimes looking at that face that used to make everything feel right just reminds you of everything that’s wrong. It feels like that more and more.
But some days, you don’t know why, you see her face and her eyes look like they could melt you like sugar in the rain. And on those days, you want nothing more than to have her hug you and stroke your hair and tell you it will be okay. And some days you let her.
She’s bringing another box up the stairs and so help you, if she cries one more tear you’re going to lock her out! You see her biting her lip and sucking in a breath. She’s fighting back tears. Good! This is supposed to be a happy day. You’ve earned your freedom. You’re taking your first big step to independence. Doesn’t she want you to be independent? Isn’t that a good thing? Why is she crying all the time? Probably hormones. “Shoot me if I’m ever a mess like that,” you think.
You’re holding your diploma in your hand and posing for pictures with your friends. She’s snapping the camera and smiling a lot. You can see in her eyes that she’s proud of you. Knowing she’s proud and happy for you makes you feel warm inside. You wouldn’t admit it to anybody, but you’re glad she’s proud. She’s not blubbering today like the day she dropped you off on campus the first time, but you see her mist up a few times. You notice a few more grey hairs at her temples. Are there more lines around her eyes than the last time you saw her? She comes over and hugs you and you let her. You even hug her back, real tight.
It’s so hot outside the pavement feels like black lava licking right up through your shoes. Your husband holds your hand (too tight for your liking) as you waddle through the doors of the hospital to check in.
“Did you call my mom?” you ask.
“Yeah. She’s on her way.”
Your pain feels a bit less biting when you see her head poke into the room. In that moment, you can’t imagine why you ever pushed her away. Even the man you adore with all your heart can’t take her place today. She puts her warm, soft hand on your forehead and you feel an immediate calm come over you.
“You can do this,” she says. She smiles down at you and you look up into her twinkling eyes. There’s something there – almost a memory. You look in her eyes and you believe her. “I can do this,” you say.
It’s the middle of the night. Everyone’s gone now. It’s just you and your little one. She lays in your arms sleeping. So small. So fragile.
She’s got her tiny fingers wrapped around your pinkie in a grip that feels too strong for such a tiny creature. You look down at the angelic face cradled in your arms and even though you just met her, you love her more than you knew you could love. It’s a love so powerful and so deep that it hurts.
And you know that someday you’re going to cry like an idiot when you’re moving boxes to her new place. You see it all like a movie going fast motion in your head. You’ll want to wail and hold onto her but you know you won’t. You’ll let her go, just like your mamma let you go. And you know in that instant it will hurt more than any hurt you’ve ever known.
You take back what you’d said. When the tears fall, you don’t want anyone to shoot you for it. You’re a mother now. Tears come naturally.
(Jan) Thank you so much Natalie! That was absolutely beautiful.
I hope you all enjoy the fabulous Summer Teen Reading Party, where fun reads abound at summer sale prices and great prizes thrown in for good measure.
Natalie's Summer Teen Reading Party giveaway is going on now through May 21 so enter through the Rafflecopter on her site for the chance to win some great swag!!! http://www.nataliewrightsya.blogspot.com/
From Kirkus Reviews: With her two best friends by her side and her mother’s memory in her heart, a teenager undertakes a journey to save the world from an ancient evil.
Emily Adams has always known she’s special. Throughout her whole life she’s had visions of things that haven’t happened yet and she could always read her mother’s mind. At least, she could until her mother died. Emily thinks her abilities are just about gone, but the arrival of a strange creature in her backyard one night proves otherwise. Emily discovers she is the last of the Order of Brighid, an ancient society of women sworn to protect the portal to the Netherworld. Now, with the portal under attack, it’s up to Emily and her two loyal, wisecracking friends to stop a villainous man before his actions destroy the world.
Natalie Wright spent her formative years growing up on a farm in Ohio. It was a fertile environment for an active imagination and inquisitive mind. She is, however, a city girl at heart and now finds inspiration in her travels and in the desert environment of her home in Tucson, Arizona, where she lives with her husband, daughter and her dog Molly.
You can “find” Natalie here:
You can Purchase Emily’s House Here:
Barnes & Noble: http://bit.ly/vlrnjp
Read the first 4+ chapters here:
ABOUT Emily's House:
Fourteen-year-old Emily Adams is flunking math - and life. But Emily has a secret, one that she has kept even from her best friends. Soon the ancient legacy coursing through her veins will force her secret to be revealed. Dormant for over a thousand years, an evil has arisen and this time, it will destroy anyone - or anything - that stands in its way.
Three teens embark on a dangerous journey and risk everything. For Emily, the fate of her friends - and her world - lies in her hands.
Travel with Emily as she unlocks the secrets of her Celtic ancestors as she goes on a mystical journey to the inner house and beyond.
Join the Journey . . .
Click on the below pic to go to the party!!! Lots of fun stuff there!
About my book, Veiled Virtues:
When Paige Stewart left America to house-sit in England, her only thoughts were to get away from her controlling mother and to have fun. Little did she know that her working holiday would find her hearing eerie voices, experiencing alarming dreams and bleeding from old scars. Although Paige's differences confuse and disgust her, she opens up to the shopkeeper of a strange metaphysical store in town, where she finds much more than tarot cards and crystals. Soon, Paige is stalked like prized game. Relentlessly pursued, her holiday takes a turn for the eerie and dangerous. Her only saving grace may be a modern-day English knight who sweeps her off her feet and recognizes the true virtues the American teen unknowingly possesses.